:D

It was back when I was playing with the guy I met online . He turned out to be a bit of a schmuck and to be honest, playing with him scared me . I had a couple moments with him where I thought "Damn, he's kinda big. He could probably do whatever he wanted and I couldn't stop him." I got a little panicky and decided not to see him again .

I started wishing I had a friend I could call up and play with instead. A friend who I could trust not to hurt me. A friend who I was sure would stop when I wanted to stop and be gentle with my emotions . In short , someone who wasn't a schmuck .

I decided to proposition my bestest guy friend. He loves me. He says I'm his favorite person . We talk about everything. He knew about my situation and that I was trying to find a solution. Trouble is , he's a good boy and he's a bit old fashioned .

He turned me down. He said he valued our friendship way too much to fuck it up by sleeping with me. He figured I was looking for something simply carnal and that would never be enough for him with me. He wasn't going to be just a fuck buddy . We left it at that. So I thought.

We went about our business of being friends. Good friends. Easy friends. He's mooned me via my cell phone and I've sent him a bra shot. It's all been innocent fun. We get to hang out together every couple of months and keep each other up to date on the latest happenings. He's had two serious girlfriends since, but each one was playfully informed that I will always be his number one .

I'm not sure why he changed his mind. Maybe it was because both of the girlfriends turned out to be a little crazy and quite careless with is heart. Maybe he wanted to play with someone who he could trust too. For what ever reason, he told me he had reconsidered and confessed to spending a lot of time wondering about kissing me .

The night we finally did something about it was like any other of our hanging out nights . I met him at his favorite bar where he could smoke out on the patio. We sat and talked for hours then walked out to my car to talk more after last call . I couldn't stop thinking about is confession . He must have been thinking about it too , because he couldn't stop smiling at gazing at my lips .